Well, it's like this, Doc, I was standing at the kitchen counter finishing up dinner and told Aud to come get her plate fixed.
Aud walks into kitchen and begins to fill her plate and I hear "oops" and then I feel pain!
For some reason, not sure why, she has a sharp 8" long knife on her plate and it has slipped off, and landed point down in my foot!!!!! Who walks approximately 8 feet with a sharp knife on one edge of a plate? Beware of mothers! They can always find a way to get to you!
I had sharpened 2 knives about 30 minutes prior to this so we could use them to cut the pork chops I had grilled and to cut cantelope. Since she was coming into the kitchen to get the porkchop I knew she hadn't cut that yet. What are you doing with the knife on your plate? Cutting my cantelope. Well, great, cantelope juice in my foot, whoopee!!!
My foot is bleeding like a stuck pig. I have a kleenex on it pressing down to try to stop the bleeding, and I am thinking when is the last time I had a tetanus shot and I cannot believe this. I sit there for a few minutes and the bleeding hasn't stopped so I hobble into the bathroom, get some hydrogen peroxide, lift my foot up to the sink (that was a sight to behold, let me tell you) pour half the bottle of peroxide over it, grab a washcloth and hold it on the foot.
It quits bleeding in a few minutes, and I get up to go find the tetanus shot record that I need, and it starts bleeding again. Great! I finally get it under control enough to go get the shot record, and hobble back into the living room and call the local clinic to see if I need to get another one because it has been 6 years since I had one. (the one I had to get when I sewed a needle through a finger, talk about fun!)
No, you don't need another one for another year or so, but you need to come in if the bleeding doesn't stop or you need stitches.
Stiches? OMG, hadn't thought of that. It is 7 pm and they close at 8, so if I am going to do something I have to do it now. I have put Neosporin on it and covered it with a bandage and taped it good, but haven't checked to see how deep it is. Yuk, this thing is going to need stitches.
Hobbling to the car with a houseshoe on the affected foot and a sandal on the other, I drive myself to the local clinic, about 2 miles away.
Get there, fill out paperwork, and don't have to wait but perhaps 5 minutes and this sweet young man comes to get me and takes me to a small room to take my vitals. 125 over 85 bp, heart rate 106, oxygen 95, ok, I can live with that. bp a little high for me, but not to shabby considering. Then he has me stand on the scales and gets my weight, we are not going there, and takes my height. I have not removed my shoes but figure that won't matter.
By the way, what is my height? 5'3".....WHAT??? Last time I checked I was 5'5" without shoes!
I have shrunk over 2 inches! No wonder my pants are so long!
I get taken to another room, wait for doctor.....
Hello, how are you?
Great! I am bleeding from a knife wound and I am 2 inches shorter than I was!
Well, hop up here and let's look at that foot!
Hmm, how did you do this? ( see above)
you are going to need 2 stitches in here.
Oh wonderful! I hate needles.
Well, I can put 2 sticks in your foot to deaden or 4 sticks in your foot for the stitches
Ok, I guess I would prefer just 2 sticks. OW! Hurts!
So I have two beautiful little stitches in my foot, it is covered with this flesh colored bandage, and I am not to get it wet or remove bandage for 24 hours.
Go home and prop your foot up and come back it if starts bleeding, and so on and so on.
See you in 7 to 10 days to have the stitches removed.
Add another adventure to the road of life.
Hope your weekend is going smoothly.